How to Write a Eulogy
Fondly Missed · 31 July 2026 · 5 min read
A eulogy is not a biography — it is a small, honest portrait of a life. Here is a simple structure, and permission to keep it true rather than perfect.
Writing a eulogy can feel like too much to ask of someone who is grieving. But a eulogy does not have to be polished or complete. It only has to be true. Here is a way in.
Start by gathering, not writing
Before you write a single line, jot down memories as they come — a phrase they always said, the way they laughed, a moment that captures who they were. Ask two or three other people for theirs. You are collecting, not composing.
A simple structure
- Open with who they were to you. One honest sentence: a mother, a stubborn friend, the person who always answered the phone.
- Tell one or two stories. Specific beats general. A single vivid memory says more than a list of virtues.
- Name what they gave the people around them. Kindness, courage, a good meal, a hard truth when you needed it.
- Close with what you will carry forward. How their life continues to shape yours.
Keep it short and human
Three to five minutes is plenty — about 500 to 750 words read slowly. Write the way you speak. It is fine to be funny; it is fine to pause; it is fine to cry. If you are worried you will not get through it, ask someone to stand ready to finish reading for you.
You do not need to sum up a whole person. You only need to help the room remember them well.